Avoiding Homework…

This might be the first time this semester that I’ve posted here simply because, well, if I wasn’t posting, I wouldn’t have a good excuse to not to do homework. Needless to say, this post has been long over-due. =)

So, well, here ya go: I have my Thai For Non-Native speakers final tomorrow afternoon. And as much as I know I should, I’m having a really, really hard time forcing myself to sit down and wade through god-only-knows how many pages of words that are theoretically different but all sound the same. Frankly, I’ll be glad to have the class over with– although this is going to be the mother of all finals: a written exam tomorrow, a presentation on Friday, and a half-hour oral exam next week… The language is interesting, of course, especially from a novelty point of view (heh– ask me to write your name in Thai when I get back. You can even choose if your name will be high tone, falling, mid, rising or low), but from a practical point of view, um. Yeah. The longest possible word is four letters, meaning that most words are actually a train-wreck of lesser words, the result of which is that some Thai words are the length of English sentences. And, of course, there’s the problem of every word sounding the same– there’s very little variety available, and in some cases the same word, maa, for example, can have five different meanings, depending on its tone.

By all this, I mean to say (in my new, exhibitionist aim of being more open and honest) that I don’t really like the language. As a novelty, fine. As a cryptic script that I can write secret notes to myself in, fine. As a language that Egan-Wright can’t speak? Awesome. At least I hope she can’t speak it. But is it worth learning a language for the sole purpose of being able to speak the one language that your High School French teacher couldn’t speak? Um… no. And is there really any other motivation (other than to ward against cultural snobbery) for me to learn Thai? Um… no. Not really. I can say that learning Thai has given me a new appreciation for certain elements of the Romantic and Germanic languages, such as spaces between words and cApiTAlization. These concepts have yet to be introduced to Thai– the latter of which is largely superfluous, but the former… Hmm. You want to know my theory? My theory is that Latin is a dead language because they didn’t delineate their words with that amazing little bit of empty space between every complete word. People got tired of trying to read the trainwrecksentences (anonying,isn’tit?) and retained their own languages instead. Simple as that. Probably an over simplification, but I don’t exaggerate to say that I would be significantly more inclined to learn Thai if the individual words were separated out.

And, well, it’s a language suited for the East. I don’t mean to be belittling, but it has evolved as a language for a primarily agrarian people, living under a monarch, under the strong influence of Buddhism. The agrarian origin, to me, seems obvious in the overwhelming simplicity of the language. You do not conjugate your verbs. There are no articles. The adjective form of a word is the same as the noun form, or the verb form. Etc. There are specific language structures and words for referring to the royalty, and specific words for referring to monks. There’s nothing elegant about it, but it’s astoundingly functional. I have a startlingly limited vocabulary, and yet it’s sufficient to get me around, from day to day, place to place, without every speaking a word of English. (Heh– but is it sufficient for tomorrow’s exam? That remains to be seen!).

But in terms of applicability of the language? Meh. I doubt I’ll ever be back in Thailand. And if I do come back, I’m sure English will be even more prevalent by the time of my return, and even in 2005 speaking English is sufficient to stay comfortably here. I don’t even have the motivation of the possible thought of impressing all my friends by going out to the local Thai restaurant and ordering in Thai– there certainly isn’t a Thai restaurant in Bozeman or Cheyenne, and even if I were able to find one in Denver, what are the odds that the waiter/waitress would be able to speak Thai?

And so that’s it. I know enough Thai to get from place to place and order some mighty tasty meals. And, frankly, that’s all I feel I need to know. Motivation, the last few weeks, has been a problem.

Yes, and I did say that I’m not likely to be back (anytime soon, at least). The experience, thus far, has been invaluable, but not one I anticipate, ten years from now, wanting to relive. There’s a whole lot of places in the world, and even more walks of life. I’ve seen one, here in Thailand. That’s one down: how many more to go?

Oddly enough, I’ve found myself with a sudden and staggering desire to improve my French. Perhaps this owes itself to the dissolution of whatever aversion I had for the language. We’ll see how things go: I intend to teach myself a bit of French this spring, and hopefully enroll in the next level of French this fall. And probably Spanish as well– although, if I ever want to graduate, I probably need to keep my number of minors to a relatively small number. Of course, it’s not a foregone conclusion that I really want to graduate.

Well, this has gone on long enough, for one night. Until–

About Mark Egge

Transportation planner-adjacent data scientist by day. YIMBY Shoupista on a bicycle by night. Bozeman, MT. All opinions expressed here are my own.
This entry was posted in Uncategorized. Bookmark the permalink.

3 Responses to Avoiding Homework…

  1. ken-mister says:

    I could have told you going to Thailand wouldn’t be worth remembering, and here i have memories of Bozeman i wont soon forget! … just kidding man, just rubbing it in. Can’t wait to see ya again bud and yes, only because i want to see my name in Tai. Peace out!

  2. Sagar1586 says:

    To answer your question: “how many more to go?” I will refer you to a race of hyperspace pan dimensional beings, which we refer to of course, as mice.

    Their answer would of course be, 41.

  3. Jenny says:

    Just to encourage you, there are three wonderful restuarants in Ft. Collins and in my experience many of them actually do speak Thai. I have an even smaller vocab than you but have brought a smile to many CO found Thais over the years with a hello in their launguage.