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… I’m DONE!. SO done. Done like tofurkey after three hours in the oven. Done like Brooks– as in … brooks & dunn? Oh noes. Seriously, I’m done. Done like too many dunn similes.

(disclaimer: the rest of this post is just a bunch of me praising myself, which isn’t even worth reading. There’s an awesome Format song that starts “can we take the next hour / to talk about me / to talk about me / and just talk about me…” You might as well click on to apple.com or some place interesting like that)

Done done ondoen Done Done done oneonefonefo dun dun dun.

Seriously. I’ve never worked this hard. Never so hard, nor so long. I’ve never slept so little. Seriously. This isn’t the sort of thing you post on a public board, but I’ve given myself a hemorrhoid from too many nights of caffeine induced diarrhea. Hey. There’s two words in a row with two Rs. How cool. Seriously, though, if you’ve never had more than 500mg or so of caffeine in a single evening, look it up. That’s what happens. Then do that every other night or so for two weeks straight. Uh.. yeah. I’m going to go see a doctor. Soon.

I have black marks up and down my right forearm, like track marks on a heroin addict. When I read, I flick my pen. Sometimes I miss, and the tip goes flying. Sometimes into my arm. Based on how many black marks are on my arm… I’ve been studying a LOT.

But … it’s just so exciting. I’ll NEVER take more difficult courses as an undergrad. More demanding courses, anyway. I’ll never have to work this hard again. But I did it. I made it through. And by all indications, I did it with flying colors.

Academically, anyway. Personally, the last week has actually been about the worst week I’ve had since fall of my freshman year…

But, right now, it’s absolutely BLIZZARDING outside. (Yeah, I know that’s not a verb, but eat me). When I dashed over to Wilson Hall (see: 300m from my dorm) this morning to slip my paper under my prof’s door (hopefully he’ll be fooled into thinking I put it under his door last night… or he just won’t care…), I had a solid quarter inch of snow caked on my by the time I made it back. On my way to work, I was trouncing through an inch of thick, heavy snow. When I dropped Patrick off at the airport at 5:00 a.m. this morning, it was 55 degrees and there wasn’t a hint of snow. Man, Bozeman’s beautiful in the snow. I think the MSU architects must have spent a lot of time thinking about “now, how would this look through snow so thick you can barely see what’s in front of you?” because it’s beautiful. MSU is fine the rest of the year, but it’s BEAUTIFUL today.

And I’m done.

Well, mostly. I still have a research paper to write when I get home, but I already have all the research done for it– I just need to come up with 5-7 pages about my topic. Actually, the challenge will be to ONLY write seven pages. I have seven pages of TINY notes. Ah…

No, what makes this feel so good is that, for the FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE, I’ve genuinely and CONSISTENTLY applied myself. I’ve worked hard. I’ve planned (pretty) well. (I don’t think I went to bed once this semester on the night before a paper was due, but on the other hand, I always got them in on time, or on time enough…). I didn’t waste time. I didn’t get distracted. Well, in a big way. I think I might have mild AD/HD. That’s ANOTHER trip to a doctor over break. Yay!

The window sill next to my desk is lined with empty Rockstar cans. Or Deathstar cans, as I call them– I’m going to detox over break. No caffeine, no sugar, no alcohol. And I’m going to go see about a half dozen doctors. And a month from now, I’m going to be well rested and healthy. Next semester I’m going to sleep more. I’ll live shorter… but ya know what? I’m fine with that. I’m absolutely fine with that.

This morning’s paper? Nine pages. Twenty-nine footnotes. All original research (I had to pull out microfilm archives for two of my sources. How COOL is that?!). The research was good, and the analysis was strong. There was a little bloat that I’ll probably cut when I reread the paper after I sober up (see: get some sleep), but it’s pretty well written, too. UNTOUCHED subject matter. To the best of my knowledge, NO ONE has written a paper evaluating the success (and lack thereof) of Federal Bureau of Indian Affairs policy from 1850 to 1890 with regards to the Spokane Indians. Ha!

Really, though, I LOVE history. I like doing RESEARCH, and writing analytical papers is immensely challenging but equally rewarding, when you find a particular angle, then build support for it and present your case in a logical, well-supported manner. There’s a good chance that I’m going to be doing research under Dr. Rydell next semester, which is a possibility that THRILLS me.

Seriously. I want to be published. I want to be published as an undergrad. I want to be published as a JUNIOR. Oh… delusions of grandeur. But maybe, just maybe…

I feel I’m well on my way.

Oh, cross my fingers for my GPA. Cross my fingers…

Man, I guess I’m overdue for a post. Well, go figure. I guess I’m overdue for some quality time with my bed, too (really, its hard on our relationship when I only get to see her for a few hours, a couple times a week … my bed that is!). But, as long as I’m at work, I might as well post. No worries, though. No worries.

Uh… yeah. The downer about doing homework for like 16 hours a day is that there really isn’t any time for interesting things to happen (I mean, screen quotas in France are interesting and all… but not the sort of thing to write home about!).

Uh. I’m not going to be evicted. Did I write that already? That was like a week ago, actually, but what-ev. Instead, I get to do a “community service” project where I will draft a proposal about how to prevent future generations from misusing the back porch … er… fire-escape. My proposed solution is simple: build another back porch, and students won’t be tempted to use the fire-escape. Huh.

In other news, we’re waiting for it to get cold again so we can build our waterfall off the side of the quad by running a hose on the roof all night. Then, when the waterfall is big enough … we’ll climb it? Yeah. But it needs to get cold again for that to happen.

OH. I went ice climbing last weekend, which was pretty freaking sweet. Actually, I don’t have any pictures that do it justice, but … such as I have give I thee? Ice Climbing.

Well, Happy Thanksgiving, everyone. It’s a little bit late, I suppose, but I passed a generally happy Thanksgiving, so … consider that to be more of a statement of condition than a recommendation. I had a happy thanksgiving. That’s what I’m trying to say.

Thanksgiving dinner would have been better with tofurkey, but, alas, I was unaware such things existed until after the fact. The mashed potatoes were sure good, though!

It was nice to see the family and, of course, to spend some quality time with Chester. =) Jenny and Tory came up from Lubbock, and my Uncle, his wife, my Cousin, and his family came were up as well. Family is nice, ya know? It’s good to see them. It was good to see my parents, too. I’m glad I got to spend some time talking to them.

The down side is that I didn’t mange to get much done. To be where I need to be, I should have been putting in about 12 hours a day with my books. In actually, it was seldom more than two hours, at best. Consequently, I spent all last night writing a paper that was due last Tuesday. I have a research project more or less due on Wednesday. Realistically, I should be putting in twenty hours of research and work on it between now and then. Which might be feasible, if I didn’t have 16 credits of other classes, all demanding my attention (calculus, especially, which is vastly time consuming).

And then there was a lot of time spent thinking and evaluating about this fall. Which was valuable.

And I got to see “the old gang minus Sagar” (heh) on Friday night. It was nice to see everyone. I’m looking forward to Christmas break.

Oh well.

The ride down and up with Dave and Christina was probably more fun than one should have in a car. =) I’ve added a new life goal: to spend a week living in Christina’s house with her family. Odds are, I’d have enough stories to last me the rest of my life. Stories about brothers microwaving their heads. Or sisters being engaged, without the knowledge of the parents. Oh, irony. Or stories about tracking red paint across church floors, or squirting tomato juice into the hair of 70 year old ladies. I mean… c’mon, now. Good times. =)

I’ve discovered something interesting about the way I write papers. It’s impossible for me to write unless I’m in the right mood. Curiously, the right mood usually entails being in some state of somnambulism (I <3 Firefox spellcheck =) ). And then, once I get started, it just works. I don't have to struggle for words. I'm slow and methodical, and what I write is logical and well-presented. And, mostly, it feels natural. It doesn't feel like trying to puzzle together-- rather, it feels more like ... baking a pie? I know what's next. I measure the ingredients and put it in. Then I look at the recipe (a.k.a. my outline =) ) and figure out what the next ingredient is and, after careful measuring, add it. Etc. I just wish I could do it a little more … on demand. For example, when I take the GRE, I’m not going to have 12 hours to try to write, fall asleep, wake up, review the material, fall asleep, wake up, try to write, sleep for another 20 minutes (heaven knows how many times I fell asleep last night between 10:00 and when I finally got going on my paper this morning at around 4:20 a.m.) and THEN, finally, realize that I’m ready to go. There’s a certain element of internalization about it, too. Somehow, sleeping seems to be the magic ingredient (to extend the cooking image, ke ke) to writing papers. Usually, if I review all the material, but have NO idea how to assemble it into an interesting and cohesive paper, all I need to do is sleep for a few hours. When I wake up, I’ve either got it, or I don’t. If I don’t, I sleep some more. Then, magically, I know what to write, I’m in the mood (which is to say I’m mostly asleep) and I write it. The only problem with sleep-writing is that I tend to repeat myself. It’s not an issue if I finish the paper in time to get some sleep and proof it, or if I can have another sober person (and by sober, I mean alert: physiologically, sleep deprivation has much the same effect as alcohol) proofread it to point out the places where I used the same word three times in a paragraph (hey, if it’s a good work, why not?), or where I re-introduce the author two times (like I think I did in the paper I wrote this morning, but I’m not sure). Anyhow. I guess I’ll go ahead and upload the paper I wrote. I’m not sure if it’ll make sense without having read the book cited in the foot notes. Regardless, it engages the way that Indians accommodated, resisted and eventually acculturated the education in boarding schools between 1875 and 1928. Here’s the link: Indian Boarding Schools in Rome

Ah, my love/hate relationship with Dell continues. Wednesday afternoon, my power adapter randomly broke. Which made me hate Dell. But then, I called Dell’s technical support, spoke to a very nice and exceptionally woman named Kalpana, and by 10:00 the next morning, I had my replacement power adapter. Which made me love Dell.

I think the general conclusion is this: if their hardware was as good as their warranty repair and replacement, Dell would be unstoppable.

On a down note, it seems that my motherboard is failing again. This will be for the fifth time in just over two years of ownership. The LED status indicator lights (num lock, caps lock, scroll lock) are starting to randomly turn themselves on and off, sometimes the system hangs when it tries to go into hibernate (“Insufficient System Resources to Complete Request”), the volume buttons have all but stopped working, and my wireless adapter is acting a little flaky. Eventually, my laptop just won’t turn on. I might be able to make it to the end of the semester before I have it replaced, but I would probably pretty much die if my laptop decided to kick the bucket just a few days sooner…

So yeah. That’s my life. Exciting, as always.

Anyhow, I’m looking forward to going home on Tuesday– real food, family and friends!

Hoary frost. My window, this morning, was covered with hoary frost.

Granular crust. My eye, my left eye, this morning was covered with granular crust.

Functional literacy. It’s amazing how many college students can’t figure out how to work the printer stations in the computer labs. Someone will swipe his card, wait, swipe it again, wait, start to show signs of agitation, swipe it again, and THEN bother to try to make sense of those four cryptic words printed in plain black ink on the card-reader: “Magnetic Strip This Side”. I’ve watched a lot of students swipe their OneCard four, five times, clearly thinking that there’s something wrong with the stupid machine!! before reading the instructions on how to use it. Man, aren’t we all so smart.

It’s almost as though I’m getting Pink Eye. But I’m not. Maybe I have an in-grown eyelash and a cold. That would explain it. Maybe the cold is in my eye. IN MY EYE!

McDonald’s is hiring. Starting wage: $9/hr. Huh.

Yeah, I guess the economy in Bozeman is strong. A good place to study economics, I suppose.

Speaking of which … eesh. I thought I was only registered for 17 credits in the spring. Not 20/21, as it turns out. I think I’m going to need to drop something.

And, actually, I might drop more than just a class.

For one, I’m thinking about not bringing my car back in the spring. It’s more a hassle than a freedom, really. There’s a good mass transit system in Bozeman these days, and, frankly, I don’t feel that I use my car nearly enough to justify paying to have it insured. Maybe I’ll call State Farm and find out how much I’m going to owe them in January. I need to call them anyway, to make sure that uninsured people can drive my car. Like Quan. And Christina. And Quan. Truth be told, the only reason Quan and I haven’t been in an accident yet is because most of the other drivers on the road are good drivers. Thank god, because Quan’s not. Remotely.

Picture Thursday night: it’s late, and time to go to Pita Pit*. Quan wants to drive; I let him– it should be an easy drive (aside from crossing Wilson St, which is always busy). Stop sign at Wilson; it’s clear both ways. I tell Quan to go, and we start out into the intersection. Then: he panics. There’s a car coming up on the right! We have plenty of time, as long as we keep going. But when Quan panics, he freezes. So, suddenly, we’re at a dead-stop, diagonally, in the middle of the intersection. There’s a car coming up on the right. Rather quickly now. And a car coming up quick on the left, over the hill. And a car straight across from us; we can’t go straight. And we’re just sitting there, at a dead-halt, screaming “Quan! Go!!“

Fortunately, the oncoming cars from both directions saw us (apparently stalled) and they slowed, allowing us enough time to coax Quan into the right line and over to the side of the road. Then there was a Chinese fire drill. As you can imagine. It’s an act that we’ve nearly mastered.

But I digress. I may not bring back my car, but that’s assuming that I don’t get evicted from living on campus. Which is kinda a concern at the moment, as I’ve been recommended for eviction. It’s kinda an odd situation. It’s another one of those “you ran a stop-sign on your bike and now you must pay $1,000,000 and go to prison!” situations. Ask me about it some time.

If I don’t bring back my car, I may not work on campus. I have the luxury of not needing to work. I want to be more involved on campus, in senate, with recycling club, etc. All that takes time. I want to have time for recreation as well. The obvious thing to cut is the number of hours that I work. But if I’m going to cut my hours from 20-25 a week to 10-15 a week, it gets to the point where I wonder if it’s even worth hassle, ya know? I’ve been a less-than-reliable worker as of late, and I really couldn’t be bothered to care.

(*-I never got my pita from the Saturday night previous, which is another story unto itself.)