“Bush is smart. I don’t think that Bush will ever be impeached, ’cause unlike Clinton, Reagan, or even his father, George W. is immune from scandal. Because, if George W. testifies that he had no idea what was going on, wouldn’t you believe him?” —Jay Leno
“President Bush is asking Congress for $80 billion dollars to re-build Iraq. And when you make out that check, remember there are two L’s in Halliburton.”
President Bush has said that he does not need approval from the UN to wage war, and I’m thinking, well, hell, he didn’t need the approval of the American voters to become president, either.”
“President Bush is going to establish elections there in Iraq. He’s going to rebuild the infrastructure. He’s going to create jobs. He said if it works there, he’ll try it here.”
David Letterman
“The president finally explained why he sat in that classroom on 9/11 for 7 minutes after he was told the country was under attack. He said he was ‘collecting his thoughts.’ What a time to start a new hobby.'” —Bill Maher
“When Stevie Wonder took the stage at the Kennedy Center, President Bush waved to him. Realizing his faux pas, President Bush turned to his wife and said, ‘Oh my God, do you think he saw that?'” —Tina Fey. Saturday Night Live’s “Weekend Update”