It’s alright / to tell me / what you think / about me / I won’t try / to argue / or hold it / against you.
I have unequivocally and unilaterally failed this Spring.
I’ve failed at everything I’ve attempted, everything I’ve tried to be, everyone I know, and everyone I’ve touched.
I’ve failed academically.
I failed to get elected.
I’ve failed finacially (I’m a mess, right now).
I’ve failed to prepare the Procrastinator (the one bright star in a dark, dark sky) to get equipment installed this summer.
I’ve failed at being a decent human being.
I know that / you’re leaving / you must have / your reasons / the season / is calling / your pictures / are falling down…”
I’ve failed as a lover.
I’ve failed as a friend.
I’ve failed as a brother.
I’ve failed as a mechanic (my powersteering pump still squeals like a stuck pig, and I had to cut off another piece of my car today outside of Casper).
The steps that / I retrace / the sad look / on her face…
I’ve failed as a carpenter (my “loft” is still a bunch of half-finished pieces in my garage).
I’ve failed as a roommate.
I’ve failed as a student. I’ve failed as a geologist, as an economist, and as a historian.
the timing / the structure…
I’ve failed as an environmentalist.
I’ve failed as a student activist.
I’ve failed as an “athlete” — that is, someone who is active.
I’ve failed as an outdoors enthusiast — making it out to ski, in total, twice this season.
And now, I’m failing as a blogger. I’m quoting Blink 182 … in italics … because that’s how damn good I am at expressing my feelings. So good I turn to the old masters of … teenage angst.
But I guess somehow it fits.
Everybody’s gone / and you’ve been there for to long / to face this on your own / well I guess this is growing up. / Well I guess this is growing up.
